Things went well yesterday until it was time to retire for the night. Then I found that the location of my stitches just south of the elbow had effectively rendered my my right arm useless. The first challenge was to remove the pullover shirt I was wearing. Not being able to bend the right arm at the elbow, nor raise it above my shoulder the gyrations preformed somewhat resembled the dance of the chicken that is so popular at weddings. Once this procedure was completed it was on to brushing the teeth. Here I encountered the next problem, apparently all the tooth brushes I have on board are right handed models and when operated by the left hand become lethal weapons inside the mouth. If you doubt me on this try your toothbrush in your left hand and see what results you get. Understanding that you have been warned in advance. The Novocaine had completely dissipated by bedtime and I was all prepared to tough it out for the night when it came to my attention that I'm a wimp and a little Tylenol is always better than a little pain. This morning brought another enlightenment. The razor in my medicine cabinet is also of the right hand variety. Now a right handed razor is a sharp instrument and considerably more dangerous than a toothbrush in the off hand. Much care was taken and the job was accomplished with no apparent blood letting.
The next project will be the cleaning and re-bandaging of the wound. According to the instructions I was given this is to be done by removing the old bandage, cleaning the site with alcohol and then applying a new dressing. There is no mention of arm hair removal or passing out when the alcohol is applied, I guess this is just understood. After I come to I'm to apply a new bandage to the area and this could be problematic as I think my medicine cabinet only contains right handed bandages.
The rest of the day will be spent searching the internet for the left hand operating manual and figuring out what other things will have be relearned. This will make for a full day of enjoying the good life from the perspective of the other hand.
I don't see the problem with using your left hand. It really is easy. Just practice!!!
ReplyDeleteSinister doings. You has me rolling in the aisle (the only place with sufficient width for the corpulent me) with your description of wound care. Are you REALLY sure they told you to apply alcohol on the stitches? Usually, that's a no-no. Apply the alcohol, in your favorite distillation, liberally down your gullet BEFORE the methanol is applied to your arm. You might not pass out, and if you do, well, you won't give a damn...
ReplyDeleteMary M, I thought about calling you and Angie for instructions.
ReplyDeleteWil, They were very specific about cleaning the wound with alcohol. The only thing missing was the bamboo under the fingernails.
WOW John that does not sound fun at all.
ReplyDeleteAlways could be worse, Barney.
ReplyDelete